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'A proper matriarch': Steve Diamond's poignant tribute to his late 85-year-old mother who moulded his tough love approach to rugby management

(Photo by David Rogers/Getty Images)

Last Friday night’s opening round win for Sale over Northampton was important in many ways for Steve Diamond. It was the club’s first round one win in the Premiership since 2013, it drew a line under the chaotic way the Sharks 2019/20 campaign ended with a match cancellation last month, and it also poignantly allowed the coach to celebrate the memory of his mother who passed away the day before the game.   

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‘Big Mo’ Diamond died last Thursday at the age of 85 following a short illness and the Sale boss used his media sessions ahead of this Friday’s trip to reminisce about the influence she had on moulding him into the style of Premiership coach that he is. 

“Around the building, in our little environment here, we have had four family deaths over the last six weeks for various reasons and none of them thankfully Covid. It puts in perspective kicking a ball around,” he said. 

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“Manu’s (Tuilagi) dad passed away. John Kirkpatrick, the conditioner, his dad passed away. Valery Morozov’s brother tragically died in a car crash the week before last, and my mum passed away last Thursday. She played a big part in my life. She was 85, she had a good innings… she wasn’t a big person actually but in the realms of personality, she could swear with the best.

“She was driving the car three days before she died. It was a very short illness. Tough lady. Six kids, all born at home, all born within six years. Had no records of her in the hospital. The last time she went to hospital was 1961 when she had my brother who was 24 weeks premature. That was the only records they had of her, so a proper tough cookie. 

“Worked all her life until she was 75. Ran the local rugby club, cleaned it, did the changing rooms, did the food, and there were lots of people my age and younger and older who looked at her for that reason. She was there 20-odd years. A proper matriarch. You don’t want anyone to leave but if it’s very short and very quick, and I can speak for her because I can do, it was probably the best way to go. 

“The way I deal with the players is a lot of the way I was brought up. My dad died when I was 15 so my mother was on her own for virtually 40 years. That’s a tough life. In the world that we live in people could take a leaf out of those days, how people lived and how people were resilient. That is what I have always taken and that is what I do. 

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“The thing I take most is how we were brought up. We were brought up with tough love and we were brought up to work at 13 and 14 in restaurants, waiting on (tables), milk jobs, on the farms locally, picking potatoes, picking carrots.

“We had an upbringing which some people wouldn’t like. Nobody ever didn’t go to school but every Saturday, Sunday, everybody was working as kids. I instil that same drive into my kids and into the lads who work for us. Some like it, some don’t.”

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G
GrahamVF 12 minutes ago
Does South Africa have a future in European competition?

"has SA actually EVER helped to develop another union to maturity like NZ has with Japan," yes - Argentina. You obviously don't know the history of Argentinian rugby. SA were touring there on long development tours in the 1950's

We continued the Junior Bok tours to the Argentine through to the early 70's

My coach at Grey High was Giepie Wentzel who toured Argentine as a fly half. He told me about how every Argentinian rugby club has pictures of Van Heerden and Danie Craven on prominent display. Yes we have developed a nation far more than NZ has done for Japan. And BTW Sa players were playing and coaching in Japan long before the Kiwis arrived. Fourie du Preez and many others were playing there 15 years ago.


"Isaac Van Heerden's reputation as an innovative coach had spread to Argentina, and he was invited to Buenos Aires to help the Pumas prepare for their first visit to South Africa in 1965.[1][2] Despite Argentina faring badly in this tour,[2] it was the start of a long and happy relationship between Van Heerden and the Pumas. Izak van Heerden took leave from his teaching post in Durban, relocated to Argentina, learnt fluent Spanish, and would revolutionise Argentine play in the late 1960s, laying the way open for great players such as Hugo Porta.[1][2] Van Heerden virtually invented the "tight loose" form of play, an area in which the Argentines would come to excel, and which would become a hallmark of their playing style. The Pumas repaid the initial debt, by beating the Junior Springboks at Ellis Park, and emerged as one of the better modern rugby nations, thanks largely to the talents of this Durban schoolmaster.[1]"


After the promise made by Junior Springbok manager JF Louw at the end of a 12-game tour to Argentina in 1959 – ‘I will do everything to ensure we invite you to tour our country’ – there were concerns about the strength of Argentinian rugby. South African Rugby Board president Danie Craven sent coach Izak van Heerden to help the Pumas prepare and they repaid the favour by beating the Junior Springboks at Ellis Park.

147 Go to comments
J
JW 6 hours ago
Does South Africa have a future in European competition?

I rated Lowe well enough to be an AB. Remember we were picking the likes of George Bridge above such players so theres no disputing a lot of bad decisions have been made by those last two coaches. Does a team like the ABs need a finicky winger who you have to adapt and change a lot of your style with to get benefit from? No, not really. But he still would have been a basic improvement on players like even Savea at the tail of his career, Bridge, and could even have converted into the answer of replacing Beauden at the back. Instead we persisted with NMS, Naholo, Havili, Reece, all players we would have cared even less about losing and all because Rieko had Lowe's number 11 jersey nailed down.


He was of course only 23 when he decided to leave, it was back in the beggining of the period they had started retaining players (from 2018 onwards I think, they came out saying theyre going to be more aggressive at some point). So he might, all of them, only just missed out.


The main point that Ed made is that situations like Lowe's, Aki's, JGP's, aren't going to happen in future. That's a bit of a "NZ" only problem, because those players need to reach such a high standard to be chosen by the All Blacks, were as a country like Ireland wants them a lot earlier like that. This is basically the 'ready in 3 years' concept Ireland relied on, versus the '5 years and they've left' concept' were that player is now ready to be chosen by the All Blacks (given a contract to play Super, ala SBW, and hopefully Manu).


The 'mercenary' thing that will take longer to expire, and which I was referring to, is the grandparents rule. The new kids coming through now aren't going to have as many gp born overseas, so the amount of players that can leave with a prospect of International rugby offer are going to drop dramatically at some point. All these kiwi fellas playing for a PI, is going to stop sadly.


The new era problem that will replace those old concerns is now French and Japanese clubs (doing the same as NRL teams have done for decades by) picking kids out of school. The problem here is not so much a national identity one, than it is a farm system where 9 in 10 players are left with nothing. A stunted education and no support in a foreign country (well they'll get kicked out of those countries were they don't in Australia).


It's the same sort of situation were NZ would be the big guy, but there weren't many downsides with it. The only one I can think was brought up but a poster on this site, I can't recall who it was, but he seemed to know a lot of kids coming from the Islands weren't really given the capability to fly back home during school xms holidays etc. That is probably something that should be fixed by the union. Otherwise getting someone like Fakatava over here for his last year of school definitely results in NZ being able to pick the cherries off the top but it also allows that player to develop and be able to represent Tonga and under age and possibly even later in his career. Where as a kid being taken from NZ is arguably going to be worse off in every respect other than perhaps money. Not going to develop as a person, not going to develop as a player as much, so I have a lotof sympathy for NZs case that I don't include them in that group but I certainly see where you're coming from and it encourages other countries to think they can do the same while not realising they're making a much worse experience/situation.

147 Go to comments
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