'I may have taken refuge in alcohol... it was not the right solution'

Carl Hayman has been speaking about slowly piecing his life back together following the receipt of a four-month suspended prison sentence earlier this year for domestic violence in France. 

The former All Blacks prop also lost his job as assistant coach at Top 14 club Pau after allegedly fighting with some players. 

Hayman has now taken to mountaineering and he spoke to Midi Olympique, the French bi-weekly newspaper, the day after climbing Mont Blanc as part of his preparation to take on Mount Makalu, the world’s fifth highest peak (8,363 meters) in the Himalayas, to help raise funds for the Samsara Association.

Hayman first addressed his sudden departure in January from Pau, the club he joined in 2016 after finishing up his stellar playing career at Toulon where he won the French title and three European Cups.

“It’s hard for me to give my version of the facts because when I left, I signed a document with a confidentiality clause,” explained Hayman to Midi Olympique. 

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“What I can say about my two-and-a-half years there is that I tried to bring my weight to the building in the building of the club with highs and also downs. I recognise that. The last year has been a sporting disaster. In professional rugby, it’s normal for coaches to drink.

“I’m responsible for what happens to me. My family life had become complicated, to say the least. Psychologically, I was not necessarily in the best position to be a good coach. But hey, it’s life and we have to get over it.

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“I may have taken refuge in alcohol to cope with the changes that were taking place in my life. It was not the right solution but I was perhaps fragile. Again, I’m not looking for excuses, I’m the only one responsible.

“When I hung up my boots in Toulon, no longer playing rugby left a big gap in my life. At the beginning, you were happy, you had time for you and your family. You were not on the road anymore every weekend. But after six or eight months, the feelings of the matches and the smell of the locker room were missing.”

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