LONG READ Wales 'in one of their deepest holes for a long time'

Those with a penchant for ancient sitcoms may recall the glorious episode of Fawlty Towers that sees a less than satisfied American visitor tear a strip off Basil in front of other guests.

“What I’m suggesting is that this place is the crummiest, shoddiest, worst-run hotel in the whole of western Europe,” he rages.

To which, the listening Major responds: “No! No, I won’t have that! There’s a place in Eastbourne.”

The exchange came to mind after hearing Jamie Roberts’ remarks on Wales after their defeat by Fiji, with the former centre saying: “It’s the worst Wales have been in the professional era”.

Statistically Roberts is right. It is as bad as anything we’ve seen over the past 30 years, matching the 10 games without a win that Steve Hansen presided over in the early 2000s.

But let’s not forget 1998, when Wales came unstuck by an aggregate score of 207-39 in Tests against England, France and South Africa.

After the 96-13 loss to the Springboks at Loftus Versfeld, a local journalist crossed the press box to tell this writer: “You’ve got a sh*t rugby team.” And that was before the hosts’ then coach Nick Mallett used the post-match press conference to dub Wales one of the worst international sides in the world.

Was it a surprise that they lost to Fiji? Not really. Indeed, some might feel the events of last Sunday carried all the exquisite unpredictability of a murder in Midsomer during Halloween week.

But maybe we are straying into Major Gowen territory. Suffice to say Wales are in a hole, and it’s one of the deepest they’ve been in for a long time.

Warren Gatland is under scrutiny: of course he is. Test rugby is about results and his team’s results have been on the wrong side of awful. Sunday will mark 400 days since their last Test win. They are 11th in the world rugby ratings, in ranking points almost as close to Brazil as they are to pace-setting South Africa. They are playing with no obvious style and there is no queue of potential replacements waiting to come in for those who are holding down places in a losing side.

Was it a surprise that they lost to Fiji? Not really. Indeed, some might feel the events of last Sunday carried all the exquisite unpredictability of a murder in Midsomer during Halloween week.

Fiji, after all, defeated England in London 15 months ago and lifted the Pacific Nations Cup earlier this year, crushing the likes of Japan, Tonga and Samoa along the way. They also went to Batumi and downed Georgia.

While they have been in form, then, Wales have been struggling. To beat the islanders, Gatland’s team needed to play well; they didn’t, with a defence that missed too many tackles and an attack that conjured too few surprises when near the opposition tryline. The hosts came out second best in terms of physicality with only two properly tackle-busting players in their starting pack in Dewi Lake and Aaron Wainwright.

Gatland has called for patience, something pretty much every team boss craves, but as one of the Test game’s most experienced coaches, he will know as well as anyone that the international game is about finding a way, finding a way to keep the wolves from the door by coming up with the occasional win. It shouldn’t be asking too much.

How good was Suaalii? Well, it is only turning the hyperbole dial a shade to the right to suggest that not since Shane Warne confounded both Mike Gatting and the laws of physics has a young Australian sportsman so startled.

But life isn’t about to get easier with a rejuvenated Australia visiting Cardiff.  The Wallabies played with vim and daring against England, physical in the forward exchanges and skilful behind. They boasted athletes and the contribution of new boy Joseph-Aukuso Suaalii deservedly attracted many plaudits.

How good was the 21-year-old? Well, it is only turning the hyperbole dial a shade to the right to suggest that not since Shane Warne confounded both Mike Gatting and the laws of physics has a young Australian sportsman so startled.

There were others such as Tom Wright, Len Ikitau, Angus Bell, Rob Valentini and Harry Wilson who were exceptional, too. Clearly, Joe Schmidt is making progress with a team that shipped 67 points against Argentina barely two months ago.

It is questionable whether Gatland has similar-quality raw materials at his disposal, but sometimes through inspired coaching, teamwork and tactics, a side can prove greater than the sum of its parts, a reverse Manchester United, perhaps.

Starting with Jac Morgan should improve the ball-carrying in the forwards this weekend, while others also need to do more on that score, while the recalled James Botham will want to make a mark with ball in hand as well as at the breakdown.

The absence through injury of Tomos Williams and Mason Grady is unlikely to help the hosts, with Wales needing a big game out of Ellis Bevan at scrum-half.  Tom Rogers will also doubtless be keen to show he has ironed out creases in his game since he last played Test rugby, 15 months ago. Gatland will want more of the same from Cameron Winnett, Blair Murray and Lake, the three top performers in the run-on side against Fiji.

Further down the line, Wales and Cardiff need to do all they can to ensure the 6ft 5in, 18st 4lb Mackenzie Martin rediscovers his mojo, because players of his size and power, who can carry ball, do not come along often this side of the River Severn.

There comes a time when there has to be clear evidence of progress in the shape of wins on the board… A coach’s best defence against adverse reviews is always for his team to start winning.

Maybe, too, it could be worth Gatland having another look at Jarrod Evans, who has been catching the eye for Harlequins. One try-assist against Exeter Chiefs recently, involving a double pump with a pass behind an advancing defender, went some way to redefining the meaning of the word ‘sublime’. Few No. 10s can manipulate defences as well as Evans. Yet Wales repeatedly overlook him.

But let’s return to Sunday.

A poor result against Australia would pile even more pressure on Gatland, which wouldn’t be an unreasonable state of affairs as a coach can only keep promising a brighter future for so long. There comes a time when there has to be clear evidence of progress in the shape of wins on the board.

Gatland has suggested increased pressure is coming from the press, but dragging the media into the argument when times are tough is a tactic as dated as William Caxton himself. A coach’s best defence against adverse reviews is always for his team to start winning.

And last weekend wasn’t just a defeat. It came flavoured with the fiasco of the wrong player taking the field as a replacement, with Sam Costelow instead of Ellis Bevan featuring on the wing as a replacement for Mason Grady. Apparently, an issue with the radio communication system led to the mix-up. Crossed wires thus became the theme of the day. Wales didn’t lose because of a malfunctioning link between pitch-side staff and the coaches, but the episode wasn’t a good look.

Of more concern will be the way they made mistakes at key times and failed to take chances that were on offer, matters that should focus the minds of the coach’s WRU employers. There has also been no shortage of calls on social media for Gatland to pay a price for Wales’ mediocrity over the past year.

There again, if Gatland left tomorrow, many of Welsh rugby’s multiple problems would still remain, including a structure that is not producing enough high-calibre players equipped for the modern game, lack of finance impacting on the performance of the regions, pervasive self-interest and a governing body that still struggles to convince all it has shaken off its historical reputation for mis-steps.

Maybe judgment on the head coach will be delayed until the spring. By then, the union will hope for more than just rumours of green shoots.

But there needs to be accountability and unambiguous clarity that the Wales job isn’t just about long-term goals. What happens in the short term counts, as well.

Gatland has been around long enough to know as much.

For the Six Nations, he should have Taulupe Faletau, Dafydd Jenkins and Josh Adams back. On his own, Faletau will make a big difference, while Adams likewise brings vast experience and Jenkins is mature beyond his years, a player who doesn’t give up.

Maybe judgment on the head coach will be delayed until the spring. By then, the union will hope for more than just rumours of green shoots. Certainly, it will be hard for anyone to persuasively explain away another Six Nations misadventure.

It will be testing for Wales against the Wallabies, too, and what’s that coming over the hill six days later? It’s the Springboks.

Testing times? Call that an understatement.